Hate Hostility

All of my life I haven’t remembered a time when there wasn’t hate, bigotry, hostility, jealousy, betrayal.  I have never known a happy family.  Ever.

Men usually are not real nice.   At least not the ones in my Family.  My Father was an absentee one & he was a wimp letting his 2nd Wife run things & abuse me.  He rarely paid any attention.   Other males?  Cousins, uncles, all pretty much treated me with no more respect than a goal post.   Invisible.

I’ll give you an example:   Sports are really big in this country.  However in my family there was a sexist view of women in that women weren’t supposed to be into sports.    When I was young it would be the male cousin who would get invited to the Football games & not me.    Females it seemed were scorned.    And yes that still hurts today.   What can I say my family seemed like they came from the freakin dark ages.    It’s gone a long way to screw me up.   But I still will find my way.   I hate sports,   I’m a loner pretty much.   And I have to figure every single thing out by myself.    I may be getting some light at the end of the tunnel.   Please stayed tuned I like to let you know how I’m doing.   Cause lord knows no one else seems to care.