I am beginning to think that I’ll never find an apartment. I know that I certainly don’t like where I’m living which is here at the transitional home for veterans.
Today I got a verbal dressing down from the case manager. Hated that. She seemed to discourage me at every turn when it comes to the apartment hunt telling me that I have a low income & that I’ll never find anything. Oh ye of little faith. I’ve found an apartment back in the 90’s with even less of an income. The case manager is on my case that I don’t check in. I hate doing that because basically its very hard to trust anyone. It’s hard to get close to anyone. When I lived at the women’s homeless shelter some 4 years ago I think that pretty much scarred me due in part to the fact that the case managers were a bit on the lazy side. They did nothing. I ache on the inside & I want some friends.
I’m tired of living here in this transitional home. I don’t mind doing the chores or even the curfew, and the no overnight stays but I hate how they want to get into your business. I want to be left alone to handle my own business. Since I’ve been burned, abandoned, people treating like shit that all takes it’s toll on your mind.
And don’t forget people I really haven’t met any NICE people who would want to get to know me who are emotionally healthy. I just haven’t been that lucky. The despair is overwhelming for me.